November 25

Arrggghhh!!!

I am getting frustrated, worried and annoyed with my body and the time. Tomorrow is my due date and yet I do not feel anything different with my body except for my sore groin and this restlessness.

I just feel annoyed with everything. I feel BLAH.

I feel guilty for feeling this way but yet I am entitled. My body is out of my control. I can't do anything but just wait and it's not a good feeling. I feel helpless and powerless in some ways.

This baby is just hanging out and I am just waiting for him. Already this baby is dictating my life and he's not even out in the world yet.

I love him. I do. And that's the big reason I am feeling this way. I want to meet him and yet I feel anxious and worried about meeting him.

The final week

It is finally the final week... week 40!

I am only 2 days away from my expected due date of November 26,2009 but I have not had any signs of anything.

It's such a funny thing. It's your body and yet you have no control over it anymore.

I am feeling excited and anxious at the same time. I want to meet the little guy so badly but yet I feel so worried and sad. I am worried about the whole labor process and sad that my life as I know it is coming to an end.

No more sleep ins in the morning. Going out whenever I want to. Doing spontaneous things... not that I am a very spontaneous person but now I won't even have that choice anymore.

I want to find out whether what people say is true... about it being the best thing in the world.

Is it better than winning a jack pot? Better than being on vacation?

It does sound silly that I am thinking this way. I do already love this little being that is inside of me. There is no doubt about that... but yet I have to think about whether it is the BEST thing in the world. The only way I can find out is by having this little guy out of me and meeting him.

I am so excited about that and so is Ryan.

Hey little dude, if you can read my thought right now... don't get to comfortable in there now. You are DUE... don't be Overdue.